I'm an adult.

thisdaysux:

You actually don’t even have to introduce yourself if you don’t want to, i don’t need an a/s/l, we don’t have to do the “hey whats up” “not much you?” thing, you can just say “so at school yesterday this idiot said…” in my ask box and I will gladly converse with you. Like seriously I will just talk to you like we’re best friends.

lampsarepeopletoo:

if you’re reading this ur fucking cute

peetasboxers:

today in between periods i was passing the boys bathroom and out of nowhere i heard like a group of guys sINGING TOXIC BY BRITNEY SPEARS AND IN THAT MOMENT EVERYTHING CHANGED BECAUSE IS THAT WHAT BOYS DO WHEN THEY GO TO THE BATHROOM I WANNA BE A BOY

shsl-chef:

when u Mom com home and make hte spagheti

stripforharry:

soolooxcoopter:

obesealpaca:

When an employee at the McDonald’s drive through asks me how I’m doing, I always ask them back, just in case they need someone to talk to because you never know

Those fries could be salted with tears

So you’re the fucker who slows down the drive through

there are two kinds of people

bynesexual:

myhumorislostonyou:

bynesexual:

dick thicker than the september issue of vogue

Is that something to be proud of? I feel like Vogue isn’t like, impressively thick.

nippled:

‘how to be bored for your entire life’ a movie starring me as me

nagei:

zacharieforpresident:

zacharieforpresident:

hey guys remember these things 

i just lost a follower

it’s like 2008 just flashed before my eyes

stargleek:

hidebehindthemusic:

vhanstiel:

Watched Tangled with my family and this brief scene showed up.

No one understood why I laughed. 

I DON’T GET IT

I’M NOT EVEN IN THE FUCKING FANDOM AND I UNDERSTOOD THIS

sadwhiteblogger:

i don’t care about whether or not people are born with their sexuality because it doesn’t fucking matter at all how it happens it happens like what difference does it make why do we all care so fuckin much

squidvincible:

muelin:

squidvincible:

muelin:

WHATEVER YOU DO IN LIFE

DO IT FOR AMERICA

DO IT FOR PAPRIKAS.

AMERICA

PAPRIKAS.

tardis221b:

when you wake up from a particularly disturbing dream and just stare at the ceiling for a while like what crevice of my mind did that even seep from 

billiejoezee:

bobeestinger:

i love how on tumblr there are people who agree with things and people who disagree with things but the only thing we all agree on is that leonardo dicaprio deserves an oscar

 I don’t care if he wins best supporting actress just let him win one already.

kingschultzies:

*policeman voice* alright sir im going to have to ask you a few questions. *pulls out notepad* where did you come from? where did you go? *slams fists on interrogation table* where DID you come from cotton eyed joe?

nevvzealand:

what do u say to ur sister if she is crying????? are you having a CRISIS

buttholeos:

i was checking out at target and this guy was being really flirty with me and his nametag said rosemarie so when i left i said “have a good night rosemarie” and he said “rosemarie??” and i pointed to his nametag and he said fuck very loud then said “they are always fucking doing this to me”

within-the-seahorses-belly:

Do you ever watch a film and there’s an unexpected hot guy and just

vvant:

let’s play a game called “are you staring at me because im hot or ugly”

katherlne:

I see London I see France. Wow. they’re both 486 miles away from eachother. That’s a long way. I have great eyesight.